Passion

So, I was chatting with my friend Drew today and I realized that I have passions for everything! These passions come, and don't go, but shift in importance according to the time in my life. See, I was driving through Salt Lake after my Stats class at the Salt Lake Center and thought to myself, "I could live right here in this very square... It has the Temple (the most important thing to me) and the LDS Conference Center, the Delta Center for sporting events and concerts (entertainment right there), and the capital building, all in a few blocks from one another. What else do you need?" Haha! I was relating that story back to some friends in the SHA office, and stated that this created all of my greatest passions. Drew said, "Linze, that's pretty much EVERYTHING right there! What do you not hold a passion for?"

He's right. I love everything around me and switch in my passions according to what I am involved with or surrounded by at the time. I did ALWAYS hold a passion for music, and I love theater. However, my passion for theatrical experience was stronger when I began my major. Now, as I am heading into communications, my interests still include theater, but politics and leadership roles have come to the forefront in my life. When I am more involved in Cougar United, I am obsessed with sports... I enjoy them thoroughly now, but I'm not as passionate - you know? I wonder if others find their passions encompass a lot and shift a lot... eh!

I use to be that way with friends, but it has gotten a lot better for me. I no longer feel the need to shift and change my group of friends, but I still love meeting and getting to know new people. I think that this need for change and shifting comes from moving so much as a young child. Perhaps I felt that I couldn't hold to anything for too long because I would lose it anyway... If I didn't hold on too tight, then it won't hurt as bad when I have to sad good-bye. Do I do a similar thing with passions and interests? Hm.....

I was contemplating this as I drove to my actual home tonight. I think that this need to detach myself carries forth in romantic relationships. There is this deep-seeded fear I hold that if I grow too close to someone I will eventually have to let go, and giving myself fully (heart and soul) to another individual is scary enough without believing it won't last before it has even begun... I didn't realize that I felt this way until tonight... I thought I was okay with relationships. I think that now, I am just starting to be... It took me realizing it to start the process of surpassing that. Interesting...

Hands slip, hearts hold...
With you I understand what faith is.

*muah*