Monday, March 11, 2013

Patience is More Than a Virtue

It's typical for girls of my age(ish) and generation to get frustrated on the lack of male participation in the dating world.  I often hear amazing women/girls say how they feel like they're on the right track and just waiting for the boys to step forward and "do something."  They are doing everything they can to further themselves educationally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually.  However, they can only do so much before a guy has to step in and make a move. However, I had a few thoughts about this for all those older young, single adult girls out there...

1 - Perhaps it's about patience and faith for a different reason than talked about previously.  We talk about how girls our age just need to "be more faithful" and really just have trust that everything will work out - I agree... and it will.  However, perhaps it's not as much for US personally as it is for our children.  This can go for the guys side as well when you're actively pursuing options and just not finding a match - In fact, all these points can apply to both sides... I'm just gearing thoughts more toward girls right now.  We're going into a time that's getting progressively harder and harder... and maybe we need to understand patience so clearly in order to understand our children clearly. Perhaps our faith is tested so we can help our children when their faith is really tested... so we know how to walk them through the feelings and situations.  At the same time it DOES help us grow, but it can then bless us in multiple ways.

2 - I was listening to a CES Fireside by Elder Bednar and his wife this morning as I got ready for the day... He talked about "not shrinking."  He told a story about a couple who had just gotten married and then the man found out he was deep into having cancer.  When Elder Bednar came to visit this couple, he felt impressed to ask him a bizarre question. "Do you have the faith to NOT be healed?"  Sometimes I have the habit of saying, "Okay, Heavenly Father... I submit my will to you completely   You can make what I want happen on your own time."  That's not real, true submission.  I thought it was, but I realized today it's not.  I have a sneaking suspicion that I'm not the only person who has thought this way.  True submission is saying, "Heavenly Father.  I'm on your time table AND plan for me... If what I want doesn't happen, that's okay... because I know your plan for me it ultimately better."  That is HARD!  I tell you... especially for an independent, "I-can-do-this-myself" kind of girl.  However, it's how true faith and submission works.

Thus, here is a dramatic example... I truly believe that I will get married and have kids in this life.  I'm not concerned about it in the long run.  However, I need to be able to say that I'm okay if that doesn't happen, because that will be the right thing.  Therefore, I am okay with that in my life.  I'm content to let the Lord completely lead me - no matter the outcome(s).  Again - this is a dramatic example and I'm sure it'll work out in this life for me (and most of you), but I needed an example to relate to this point.

3 - A few weeks ago I saw Sheri Dew speak at an Institute Forum and she made this comment: "If all the prayer and righteous deeds in the world could get you married, I'd have been married awhile ago."  This wasn't said in a cocky way in the least... It's more like a reality call to stop beating yourself up.  If you're making good choices and doing good things, sometimes it's just not TIME yet.  I hate that answer too.  Haha!  However, it makes me realize how aware HF is of my needs personally - He knows me SO well.  He knows YOU too.  You'll be thankful when the right when comes along, or you realize who the right one is, and you're still able to be with that person.  You'll be so overwhelmingly thankful how it all went down - promise.

I know. I know. This all said from the single girl who has had very few boyfriends in her life... but I still think I can know and speak truth.  Hear me out... It'll all work out.

Song of the Day:  I went down to St. George with some friends for the Macklemore concert... So fun!  Thus, here is a song from Macklemore and Ryan Lewis called "Gold" - it's one of my faves.  I'll post pics of the trip later in the week.  Enjoy!

1 comment:

Erin said...

I love this! I think so many of us "older single girls" got the same thing out of the Elder Bednar fireside. I've also thought about the children thing...there are so many amazing girls out there (and guys), perhaps our children need to be born at a specific time? Just something I've thought about. I also recently learned that the Lord is capable and does put things in our lives that take advanced planning on His behalf and if it was His will for me to have a husband and family at this moment He would have made it happen. (I just blogged about that idea.)